All i Ever Want To Do iS Worship . . .

Sunday, October 17, 2004

ur absense makes it winter

there was this statement made my someone, i dunno who, but here it goes, "if i were given a chance to relive my life, i would live it no other way than this". i would too, cos i would say that i have no regrets and i have seen light again. hahah... yeah i was somewhat blinded by myself and drowned in dellusions of my mind. that was rather bad lah, and the time that i lived without God, was painful and tiring, self fulfilling and destructive. one word, baddddddd...

i havent really been studying much recently, but i guess i will do so tmr due to the fact that the paper's on the following day and i need to study for it, and the preassure i high, yepp my only motivation to study now lah... i need preassure from the circumstance, no amount of peer preassure is going to work, nagging will only mount to painful effects gone to waste, making me all the more lose the mood to study. guess its really getting on my nerves, this lack of motivation to study! and even better still, i have people telling me that their exams are over. anyway gosh, i really pray that all my friends will be promoted lah. really hope that whatever that u need to get promoted wil be given to you. it sounds really sad that my friends have to retain lor. have this sng friend in church that most likely is getting retained or under conditional, and then another one needing econs to pass to make it thru, hope all cj peeps will make it thru!!! its 2 As!!! and hope i will not retake any module; this is all but empty talk. ahhahahaha... :)

oh and i've found a show to watch, almost forgot about it, the new police story, when i was like" i must watch it" when it first came out. i must put word to feat.. anyway i also must try to control my spending too. it doesnt seem nice on me presently. spending > saving? hahahah... oh wells its the exam period. and i m going 'to get a marche treat this week!!! hahaha.. a wager made when we took our Os that who ever beat the other would treat. hahah.. yay! but anyways i think i m going to splurge this time round. the only few people that is crazy enough to actually go out after each paper to enjoy. and spend so so so much money, not to relief stress, cos there aint to stress, but outta habit lah, i guess... :)

friday i simply placed myself at the frontline of attack of tempations, went to the apple and creative website and feasted my eyes on mp3 players and drives and comps and everything lah!!! *drools* hahah... argh.. it aint good to know that you arent even half way in the saving part and u are spending all of it on other things like pool and movies and comics.. hahah.. badddd... anyway comics are really getting on my nerves, i have been waiting for like a mnth of the book to come out, and its not out yet!!!!! argh... think i shall switch to novels soon, where i do not have to wait for each book to come out, or in between the publishing of each book i can read a novel. but then again, i'm too lazy and also have too short an attention span on a too thick book. but would truely like something to chew on and think about. but first, i think i complete what i have set myself to do, finish the bible itself first. challenge? yesh ahahah.. discipline lah. and also i have to go run tmr!!! i have to!!! -_-

the end of the exams mark the start of a period of high stress and activity pack schedule. oh well, at least i have something to keep my mind occupied and more active than usual sch days! compared to those people who do not even have the ability to do so in sch. yeah i guess so then. but i think i will enjoy my holidays with all these things lah.. although once in a while u will hear me grouse a lile here and there, but i guess it's going to be fun over all.. :)

the language is such a beauty, where in the play of words, it may mean something else, with the change of phrasing, something so obvious, hidden. emotions caught within, moving the reader, yet, subtly telling a story, not to the mind but the heart. having something so minute, sound so major, something appearing to be nothing. was trying to put thoughts into words for something that happened, yet unable, lest it may stumble people. hence, no matter how much of a failure i feel, it shall not appear here till later.. :)

"i think my mum knows" - oh who cares. :)

"how is ur bro and his gf going along" gosh my mum asked me that question point blank, and how could i answer it? how would i know?! i had to find it out myself to know about it lah.. haha.. so much for having ur mother ask u if u were attached. hahah... anyway i m my brother's keeper! ;)

sometimes u cant be too chosy and picky, you cant get a perfect girl.. ok like duh. that was from my leaders lah. and youth pastor, like super diaoz lor.. ahhah.. anyway my reply was simple. my wife would be outta this world! hahahah.. anyway who would wanna go bankrupt with me and rely totally on GOd? who is outta her mind to do so? ahhahaah.. ok nvm about me.. :) so thats why i say its more a blessing to not be with me.. :)

argh ams sucks big time!!!! :) anyway i think i shall go do some homework that i should clock for today and then go slack again la.. as usual.. :)

??eh i just forgot what i wanted to place here... argh..??

MarkSae, Da-jie Bid Goodbye at 10:38 PM

i.S. t.h.i.S. t.h.e. e.n.d. o.R. t.h.e. S.t.a.R.t.