All i Ever Want To Do iS Worship . . .

Friday, November 19, 2004

in my shades of black and white

spent the entire week out, oops, and i didnt know why i had put myself through the torment of this whole absense. or maybe just havin the fact to hope that my blog would actually automatically update itself without me actually having to type. rather funny seeing the date not move for days eh? was actually thinkin of not updating it til i get back next monday, or tuesday for that matter, dont think i will have the energy after the travelling to start another entry about bang kok. oh who damn cares anyway. so i shall do an entry before my disappearence.

you are such a liar mark. hyprocrite, selfish and dellusional, someone tell me please tell me that its all not worth it anymore, within a week cryin just too many times, its not worth it anymore, where i have things better to do and think about. someone please, tell me to do what i practice, stop lookin back, stop procrastinating and wake up....

i was glad i spoke to a friend yesterday, who somehow didnt know what was happening, yet reminded me my cause and refreshed my spirit with words, angry and yet reproaching, not to me, but impacted me, well i guess it really did wake me up a lile bit, and hope i would continue to stay awake for now...

ha quite a loooong day yesterday and rather exciting, with me running about and waiting and running and waiting and watching show, it was funn... hehe.. with good company of people that i havent seen in like AGES!!! haha... well they are cool people, rite? haha... hmmm...

actually i dun really have much to update on, but surprisingly, i actually dun have much of an adreneline about the flight off later, it doesnt seem as if i m going to fly of in a matter of hours. maybe its just because im like 2 hours away from leaving home and i stil havent packed my bag... maybe thats why. and with all the rushing around yesterday, not to get things to fly off, but just going out and watching movie and all the hassle, i guess the mood of me wouldnt set in until i sit on the plane and think.

my other worry is my late late nites of slplessness and also my diarrhoea, with the irregular meals and the early mornings, i fear that i wouldnt be able to wake up tmr morning and gastric... blah blah blah... nah shall just go there relaxed and leave everything in God's hands, i m going to go there and enjoy myself, i hope.....

i guess i'd go now, there is much i want to say, but there is nothing i would want to speak of, i dunno why i keep repeating this line, hopin that someone, you, would say something, stop avoiding and start talkin...

so what is the color of love?
grey

MarkSae, Da-jie Bid Goodbye at 3:18 PM

i.S. t.h.i.S. t.h.e. e.n.d. o.R. t.h.e. S.t.a.R.t.