All i Ever Want To Do iS Worship . . .

Sunday, October 15, 2006

a pack of cigrattes and you

when so much is all happening at the same time, you cant find a reaction, you cant react to anything at all.

jae

love is knowing that you've made a decision that i dont agree with yet standing by you and telling you that if you ever still do need me, i'm there; thanks for not telling me, thanks for keeping that part of the agreement.

but it hurt more when you did that, it hurt.

He

i know you're giving me another chance to make the right decisions from the start of my failure again, but then it isnt the same is it? i'll try not to disappoint? its my part of the promise to keep now isnt it? yesh Father.

you know

how have i been? as good as you are.. and that means not too good eh? maybe its because we are, thats why i know, as much as i havent been having a good time, as much as i havent been anywhere near good, you arent too. my guess is that, we've been stepping in and out of good and bad, the good helps keep us sane, and the bad just adds to the pile, at least there's good to keep us there. but when the good doesnt come, you know where to come to right, i'll also need my good times from you too.

"its, i dont want to touch her time, and she doesnt want to either... heh.. thats the little prob that we have.." right?

i wish i could just slow things down. but if time doesnt travel at this pace, the end would never come would it?

mummmm...

im sorry if i didnt reply your sms, i just didnt know how to. honestly, there are many things, many issues, many whys we would never get a satisfactory answer to. and no its not because having share too much that puts people off, its rather fine, with me it was, but i'd have us stay this distance for now. its not time but space that we need, thanks for trying and i know that this friendship is very precious, and will be, but there's always moving on, i'm sure God didnt make the me the only me-kinda-person in this world (He proved it to me when twin appeared). there are many people out there who can be and would be good friends with sound and wise advise to listen to.
i'm sorry. its me to blame.

God

when the world crashes down on me, who do i turn to? and i'll still thank you for being there, for being everything, just for you, i need it. really very much at this time.

excuses or explanations?

so much for saying that its an excuse and then giving me one and say its a logical explination. i'd rather you say nothing.

MarkSae, Da-jie Bid Goodbye at 3:47 AM

i.S. t.h.i.S. t.h.e. e.n.d. o.R. t.h.e. S.t.a.R.t.