All i Ever Want To Do iS Worship . . .

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

the old to go,
so the new can come

i decided to listen to music instead of watching online teevee today, so when you're listening to music, somehow you have to occupy yourself at the com, doing something, or if i'm in the mood, doing nothing; which i'm usually in the mood for. ok ok, back to the main point,i went blog hopping, after quite a long time of not doing so, wonder if so and so's still alive, where they presently are, or anything a used-to-be social geek would do. reading really random posts, some really meaningful post, and some oh the same updates on how life has been, how exciting or how sad it has been, and realising that hey, mine's not the only stagnant blog! (well, that is much to my comfort really....) i missed the days where i'd just add random post. well now i'm scared of what i post.

actually i've always been scared of what i post. its either i offend someone (get sued), appear too opinionated (get ~~ISA-ed~~censored), say something wrong(the BARRACKS), and the list could just go on and on...

i had the habit of reviewing what i used to write, but while i was blog hopping, it just dawned on me the stuff i used to type here. quite stupid sometimes eh?

i'm a loner, while the world revolves around me.

20 july

if only i grew up wanting to be normal
if in wanting is not having,
then in having is in not wanting.

there's alot clogged in this minute brain that i have sitting somewhere between my cranial space.

its tiring being yourself, contradictory eh?

some changes you cant force,
and there are some you just cant evade.

you know me well enough to know that you dont know me at all.

well, i mean i'm kinda not telling.

the past holds enough to tell whats become of the future.

stubborn enough to not recognise pain, but not stupid enough to not understand.

they said that i needed some love, i thought they wanted to poison my drinks.

i'm no stranger, you're the strangers to me.

i've read the signs, and got lost

so....... . . . . . . . . . . . .

i've been up to?

its been tiring trying to tell people what i've been up to. i know it sounds kinda cynic when i reply to hows work. there can be only one answer i've found myself able to blurt out, like that lor. seriously, after a while, you ask me that question, i dont really know what to say. and i have given the same to many others. *smile?*

i've bought myself a new minihifi set in my room, rather its kinda like a mini room theatre system, just need to get myself an LCD TV and i'm rather fixed. and i can dont switch my com on that often and listen to music now that i've got radio and too many cds that i've not played. just to read a book or anything that doesn't require me switching on the computer. kinda out to save electricity here i guess.

been back to reading, which is why i can write. i kind of see the connection here now, but well, guess after the next book i'm left stranded with no more books to read again. and you know that literature's not cheap to buy. the small little book called "the curious incident of the dog in the night-time" by mark haddon cost me 17 bucks, and if it was not on discount at popular, it would far from the thought of me buying it. and some would just love to advise me to head down to the library. (:

i've been running alot. and the distances have been increasing, just that each time, i hope that the time taken shortens.

advise are good, they irritate, just like how a needle goes into your body to tell you that you're alive, but the thing is that, if you do that often enough, you get a high from the needle. but when it comes to advise, somehow, it becomes the other way around.

sometimes care until figuring out that it hurts alot less to just not care

MarkSae, Da-jie Bid Goodbye at 10:01 PM

i.S. t.h.i.S. t.h.e. e.n.d. o.R. t.h.e. S.t.a.R.t.